What I do vs.what I want to do

I don't know if any of you are anything like me, but there are times when I feel torn and confused. Confused between what I want to do and what I actually do.

There are times, in all well-meaning, I want to do something right. For example, I want to be early for a certain appointment. Unfortunately, somewhere along the way, I get late. Because I spent a few more minutes sleeping after the alarm went off. Then I took a little longer to take a bath, because I was enjoying the warmth of the water. By the time I'm out of the house, I'm ten minutes late, but I console myself that the car I'll use will make up for lost time.

But I run into traffic, and things move from bad to worse. It takes much, much, longer than I'd anticipated. By the time I get to the appointment, I look like a person who has no clue what time is.

Or when I want to clean the house by a certain time. But as I clean, I see an irresistible article in a magazine, and sit down to read. "It'll only take a few seconds", I tell myself. After I'm done reading, I continue with the cleaning, and then hunger creeps in. I look in the fridge, pick up something and warm it. I sit to eat, thinking, "A few minutes of eating won't hurt, will it?" By the time I'm done, I'm way behind my schedule.

 And such is my life. A constant war between what I want to do and what I really do.

A letter to Joseph

Dear Joseph,
I hope this letter finds you well. I have a few questions for you, I hope you don't mind my asking.

First, how did it feel to hear that your fiancée was pregnant? How did she break the news? Was she excited, scared, nervous...? And how did you take it? Were you nervous? Angry? Afraid? Disappointed? How did it feel to see your wife's stomach growing with a baby that wasn't yours?

How did it feel like helping Mary give birth to Jesus? Was it scary? Was it love at first site with Jesus? Was he preciously pretty as you held him? Did he cry all night? Was he quiet? Did  your hands tremble as you wrapped him in swaddling clothes?

How did you handle the terrible twos? Was he everywhere doing the wrong things? Was it easy to teach him how to potty? Was he a nightmare during meal times? Did he enjoy eating? Did he spill his food on his clothes as he ate? Was he a jolly, happy, child?

How was Jesus' first day of school? Was Jesus a fast learner? Did he always do his homework? Was he always inquisitive? Was he quiet? Was he a brainerd? Was he your average student?

Did Jesus like to help around the house? Did he moan over his chores? Did he ever get into brawls with his siblings? Was he overprotective of them? Did he like to share his things? Did you find yourself constantly refereeing fights and tussles? Was he always willing to help out around the house?

How did it feel when you finally met in glory? How was it to see your son in full splendor and majesty? Were you in awe? Wonder? Shock? Were you amazed? How did it feel when he introduced you to his Father?

I really hope you do find time to read and response.

Yours Truly,

Me.